Dear Person who is sad because of a loss,
Welcome to my life. You are most definitely not alone. With Christmas right around the corner, all I
can think about is how alone I feel. I
can only think of how my mom will never share another Christmas with me, how my
dad is dating again, or how the person I love doesn’t feel the same, and I
can’t even talk to my mom about it. (Literally the worst.)
If you’ve ever gone through something similar, chances are
you must be tired of people telling you there is someone better for you out
there or that you just have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and move on.
The people who say these things mean well; after all it’s hard seeing your
friend, significant other, or family member sad, knowing you can’t fix it.
But I’m here to tell you something different. I say that
advice sucks. I say let yourself be alone, be sad, be an individual, be you. I found out that it’s okay to be
sad. Just sit there a second and cry
because the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Let yourself feel the
pain, because at least you know that you’re alive. What you feel right now is
real, while the opposite of love is indifference. You know that what you felt
was real that person, because this feeling is even more real.
Remember that your body cannot internalize this sadness,
because that’s when bad things happen and sadness sticks around. I did that for
a while after my mom died, and it only hurt me in the long run. However, if you’re
sad all the time, you should probably go see someone, or talk to your friends,
or at least make sure you are not alone.
Guess what, Person? You will never be alone.
There is someone in this world that loves
you. You are important. You will get
through this season. Whether it’s a death, break up, finals-whatever is making
you sad shall pass. You have your teachers, your family, your friends, your
co-workers, your pizza delivery guy or girl; you have someone. I'm sure that you’ve already heard this, but it’s true.
Just make sure you don’t shut these people out by yelling at them. Just tell
them you’re sad and tell them what you want them to do, because it can be
confusing when trying to help a sad person.
Be truthful and honest. Say nicely that you do not want to talk if you
don’t want to talk. When we’re sad, we tend to overlook the people who are
there for you. If you are like me, you
are so absorbed in one person, you fail to see the many persons you have
already, people who are there for you already, while all you have to do is ask.
Being sad is about you. Now, anyone can tell you how to stop
being sad, but it’s really up to you. We
all deal with tragedy differently, and that’s okay, because that means we are
not all the same boring people! I
believe in you, if that counts for anything.
We can be sad together.
It gets better, and you will be better because of it. The sad moments in life make you super
grateful for the happy ones. Be sad, but
also be happy for who you are. Also be
friends with your pizza delivery guy because sometimes they give you cookies,
or don’t take cookies from strangers. It
depends on how you were raised…
The Galleon is curated and managed by Christian Brothers University, a Memphis-based university founded in the Lasallian tradition (a sect within the Catholic faith). Part of our founding mission is to uphold respect for all persons-regardless of political, religious, or social beliefs. As an institution, we take no stand on political matters; to do so would undermine our commitment to intellectual inquiry and thoughtful response to events taking place in our World by members of the CBU community.